I got changed!

I am posting the last two weeks in this post. I think that time is just flying and I cannot imagine how fast it goes for a missionary who is super busy every day! We have passed the 10 month mark! Crazy, it still doesn't seem like that much time! Alex is (was) having a lot of trouble with his companion and I feel so bad for him. I want to protect him from all things bad but Heavenly Father has a plan for him and is teaching him quickly. This first letter is kind of sad and depressing. I am sad for him but I know Heavenly Father is preparing him for something down the road. Something amazing!

Okay, it seems that the audio doesn´t work - your bitrate was 256 and the ones my camera makes are 44 - maybe a little too much for the camera. It says 44kbps, 4bit 1 channel 11KHz IMA ADPCM. Don´t know if you can try saving the ones you have in that size - I think audacity or garageband would have the options to save like that so I can hear it. I would just put it on the computer and play it, but they have a weird anti- headphone thing in the mission, so I can´t.

Anyway, this has been a rough, rough week. I got sick on Saturday, and could barely go out. I am still pretty bad. I have what appears to be the flu, with bad poo, crazy runny nose, and strange aches all day. I am taking some drugs but they don´t do much.

I´m listening to those recordings. It´s really fun. A lot better than just words.

"Tell Alex to send more BODILY INJURIES. Those are awesome."

That´s awesome.

I´m not feeling particularly inspiring today. I am learning that I´m a lot tougher than I thought, will all the insane things that have happened.

My companion is really struggling right now. I asked him straight if he hated the sector or not. He looked at the ground for a few seconds and said yes. He went on to say he doesn´t find any love in himself for the people (naming a few by name, which surprised me, as they were some of my favorites). He doesn´t have any drive to do anything, and I´m sick as anyone´s ever been, so we haven´t really done much recently. He even said he is absolutely disinterested in talking to me, and because of that we have not progressed much in unity. Not only that, he doesn´t like anything I do or say. I plan alone.

Like I said, it´s been hard. I don´t want to start the drill sergeant angry thing but nothing else works. I know how much I hated it, so I´m hesitant to do it to anyone else. But the choice is seeming to be that or work alone. I would like him to leave. I think it would be better for everyone involved.

One of the interesting things that I´ve realized recently - in my patriarchal blessing I´m blessed with love for people. I´ve never not had love for people in the mission. You could say God kept up his promise. I never even considered how hard it would be if you didn´t even love the people - I don´t know how you´d get out of bed in the morning in the mission. Why else would one be here?

I´m thankful for that gift. A person can talk about how I don´t commit people to be baptized fast enough, or how my contacts are slow and lame, but no one can say anything about my motivation. And rest is doable if you´ve got a motive.

I have spent a little time thinking about what you could send me. I have been unable to think of anything. Anything I could want I have or I can´t have. I was going to ask for an analog watch, but I found one in the pension and fixed it up so now I don´t need one. More CDs, preferably an MP3 CD with several albums so I don´t have to keep so many. That´s all I´ve got.

I´ll keep thinking about it.

Keep progressing, and, like Randy´s dad says, "Take care of your feet."

Love,
Elder A Conrad Crist




July 18, 2011

Somebody sign into facebook and say yes to all the people who are adding me. There are a few.

I´m afraid that the audios are still too big. Needs to be 44kbps, 4 bit. I think audacity has the options to do that.

Anyway, the biggest news item for today is that I got changed. It´s a very strange division, three changes, but here we are, and here we soon shall not be.

Like Dad has said, the mission is a really long 50-miler in terms of baggage. The more intelligent, older missionaries have perhaps 25 pounds, while the noobcake people have 45 or so, mostly of ridiculous things like canned food and other nonsense. I´m now well into the old phase, so packing was a matter of folding some clothes up. I already knew how I was to put everything in, for I´ve done it twice already.

So today I go to say goodbye and stuff like that. I actually have only four families I need to visit, and an additional two to call. I don´t know if I just didn´t do my job enough to meet and love all the people. Whatever. I find that I haven´t actually done a lot of things I regret here, so we´re okay. I guess I just wasn´t a "big splash" here.

The only thing that really makes me sad is our best investigator ever, Carlos. I´ve told you about how we knocked the door of his parents-in-law and they were members, and they were reactivated. He has been to church twice now, and likes it. His girlfriend asked him if he´d like to be baptized, and he said yes. The only thing that´s hanging him up is that he´s not married to her, and they kind of live together. The parents said they´re sure he about to propose and get it all fixed. The only thing is that I won´t be here to see it. I´m on the records, but I kind of wanted to be there. That kills, that. Ach.

I´ve listened to the recording. In audacity, there´s one of those hangy bars, I think FILE, and there´s a save wav, I´m almost sure. All you´d have to do is put 44 and 4.

Anyway, I´m gone, and it´s kind of lame timing. I asked President King to watch out for Elder Aguilar. Honestly, I´m a little scared for him. I make pretty clear the level of problem he has with the sector. President King´s comment on him was something like, "Elder Aguilar has some rough times ahead. He is going to have to learn to humble himself before the Lord." Oh, man.

You know, I think the whole relationship, or lack of relationship, comes somewhere from in there. He doesn´t want to be here. I don´t know how exactly his lesson´s going to come, but he´s going to have to find it soon if he doesn´t want to suffer a lot. He´s got, in all probability, two to four more changes here. That´s a long time, as far as I can think - imagine six months in a job you hate from which you can´t quit or take a vacation. I´ve been blessed, but blessed (that´s a Chilean expression) in terms of love for people so far. I am finding out that I have a really, really heavy prejudice against leech/entitled people. Other than that, I do fine. I gave it at lot of thought - I think pride is the thing that deters me. Could be.

I´ve also started applying Getting Things Done in the mission. Preach My Gospel is very conventional, and good, but I find that the planning section is too "How many people can we push to be baptized this month$" which is to say, less about people than it should be. I think about people in more of a person-by-person way, and I find it gets to the goal better than putting a made up number and then trying to figure out how to force someone to accept our will. GTD says when planning, one should think about the very next thing that can be done with each person, not so much a top-down "People we can get to accept a date", "People we can get to church," etc.

But if I´m wrong, I suppose I´ll have to change. This, my friends and countrymen, is the destroyer of people. I think of myself as humble only because I´ve been hammered so hard so far in the mission. But if I can´t teach, contact, or baptize, at least I can change to be able to do it. I´ve thought about Satan a little more than I should have in my trials to find my testimony. One valuable thing, though, is the realization that if he hadn´t had pride, things would not be at all the same.

Imagine it- I am Satan, everyone is obligated, everyone comes back. (We can argue also that the plan he proposed was just to usurp the power of God and destroy us all right there in terms of progression, but anyway, for the purposes of the story,) Then Jesus stands up and says no, we get agency, and he´ll go and save our bacon. We liked that plan more, and God approved it. What would have happened if he´d said, "You know, Jesus is a pretty smart guy. His plan was better - I´m just going to go along with it."

That´s not what happened. He got angry, and left, and the rest is history - or more accurately, the Bible.

Well, then. That´ll be all. I´ll be somewhere that´s not here tomorrow. Prayer, please.

Love,
Elder A Conrad Crist


Random note before I forget - I will write to as many people as will write to me separately. There´s nothing holy about ludacrist5; Jake and Abby or whoever can write separately from wherever and I will respond as individually as people write.